Dear Fi,

Happy Birthday wonderful girl! I’m not going to bombard you with cringey birthday cliches. I think you are like me in that you find birthdays to be bittersweet, especially when life is messy like it is right now and falls short of what it should be. I recognize that as a 23 year old with no legal relation to you, on paper the integration of my presence into your life is atypical and unorthodox. However, I am a firm believer that in our lives, everything has its place, and I am grateful for whatever stars had to align for you to end up in mine and vice versa.

You turn 17 today which is worth celebrating because god knows those 17 years were hard. I know that you’re just counting down the days until you’re 18, but please give 17 a chance. 17 was the year I first met the person who is now my best friend. In fact, almost every person who I care deeply about in my life are people I met after I was 17.

I’m by no means saying that this is the year that everything gets better. Family is going to remain complicated and painful and disappointing. You will never stop grieving the birthdays and support and love you didn’t receive. But I need you to know that there are so many people who you haven’t met yet who will love you. The love will be effortless and unwavering and it will never stop welcoming you home.

Happy Birthday, Fiona!

I know the household dynamic is weird and life is heavy and unfair and I don’t have any answers or solutions, but I love you so much. It is effortless and unwavering and it feels like home because home is where your family is.

Love,
Aunt Grace